Thursday, November 24, 2011

A heart of thankfulness

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all! In true night-owl form, I am up late enough to usher in the first moments of Thanksgiving 2011. 

I'm up, but not because I'm frantically running around scrambling to clean my house and get a menu ready. I'm just up toodling around, getting some things ready for tomorrow, mostly because I'm like a little kid and can't sleep when a gathering or something exciting is about to happen. 

As I was cleaning earlier in preparation to host my in-laws tomorrow, I felt abnormally relaxed. Usually, I would be bouncing off the walls, shouting demands like a drill sergeant, and tending to every nook and cranny of my home in hopes of achieving the "perfect" Thanksgiving.

But not tonight. I stopped while wiping down a dining room chair and thought, "Hmm, wonder why I feel so relaxed? Why, I don't feel stressed at all." 

Then it hit me. I realized that Thanksgiving (or any gathering, for that matter) is not about how clean my house is or how wonderful my meal turns out. It's about the love that is going to fill my home, reverberating off the walls and easing the souls that are contained within. 

We are going to eat. Oh, good Lord, yes, we will eat! We are going to fellowship. We are going to share laughs, hugs, and full tummies all around. 

Do I care if my floor's so clean my guests can eat off of it? No way.

Do I care if my guests feel loved and cared for while they are visiting my home? Absolutely. 

That will be the perfect Thanksgiving. 


Have a blessed and happy Thanksgiving!

God bless,

Miss K

Friday, November 18, 2011

Empty me, Lord

I've been in a barren valley of destitution and loneliness for quite a while now. Yes, life has continued to whizz by and I've remained functional, dare I say, even "put together" from the outside. 


What's going on inside is a different story though. Altogether different. A stark contrast. I'm a mess. A gross, ugly, hormonal, sleep-deprived mess. I feel like I'm barely keeping it together. Running to and fro, busying myself with life's "needs" and "have tos." And I was SO determined not to let this holiday season run rampant while I'm chasing behind it with one shoe on and tangled hair ... 


I've come to a realization. I. NEED. JESUS. But, wait, you might ask, I thought you were a Christian? I know, confusing, right? Well, let me break it down for you. Anyone who's been a Christian for any length of time will tell you that there are times we get too complacent in our faith; we talk the talk, but we don't walk the walk. 


For the last ever-so-many months, I've been talking a big game, but I haven't been walking it. I've been hitting the ground running in the mornings, when what I really need is to hit the ground crawling, as in, on my knees. Before the Lord. I need to thank Him for another day (because every day truly is a gift) and ask for His mercies and HIS will in my life for that day. 


I need to involve God more in my life all day long. Talk to Him, cry out to Him, sing worship to Him, and, most importantly, LISTEN to Him. I need not be so wrapped up in my to-do list that I don't have time for my Lord and Savior. After all, is He not the reason I have life and this to-do list in the first place? 


This realization is humbling. It's little ole stubborn me finally saying, "I get it, Lord. I'm not in control. You are. I can't do this alone. Take my life because I'm making a mess of it." 


Perhaps it was the Lord who caused me to spill that half-gallon of creamer all over myself and the kitchen a few days ago while pancakes and bacon were burning on the stove and who caused my tank top strap to pop right off as I was hurriedly getting dressed this morning. I think it was. He's trying to get a hold of me; to shake me and wake me up. To tell me that what should matter most to me is HIM. His thoughts of me. His plan for my life. His will. 


I've arrived. I'm present now at the Lord's feet and waiting for His will to be exacted on  my life. Fully. Vivaciously. Richly. I need you, Lord Jesus. Calm me. Carry me. Empty me. 


Make my face a reflection of Yours and my life a reflection of Your grace. Empty me of anything that is not of You, but is of me. I want more of You and less of me. Your grace is sufficient for me. 


Monday, November 14, 2011

Food Beauty ~ Operation Healthy specs to come

Despite a nasty little cold I've picked up, I'm forging ahead and beginning Operation Healthy tomorrow (or later today, rather, seeing as it's past midnight) as planned. I'm in the last-minute planning stages of it, so all will be revealed then. I would love for you to join in if you so desire. In the immortal words of Winnie the Pooh, "It's so much friendlier with two."


Until then, I'm going to share some motivation. Since we became members of our co-op, I have made so many lovely discoveries about food. One of the things I've enjoyed most is seeing all the beauty the Lord offers us through the foods He has provided for us to eat in nature. I thought I'd share a few photos of the beauty we've been blessed by these last few months.


Enjoy! Please disregard my amateur photography skills. I'm working on them; I promise.



Candy-cane-striped beets (just in time for the Christmas season)


Tri-color sweet peppers (red is my favorite)


A beautiful bounty 
(Check out the oranges. They're Cara Caras. Find some and dig in. 
They're increĆ­ble. No joke.)

These pictures make me totally stoked to fill my days with real, nourishing food. Cheers!

God Bless,

Miss K


P.S. I'm working on a redesign for the blog, yet again. I'm still not thrilled with the look of it. I'm hoping to debut the new (and, fingers crossed, final) blog design within the next week or two. Wish me luck! 

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

An Epiphany and Operation Healthy

Morning, y'all! 

Just wanted to share an epiphany I had a bit ago. I just got home from the gym, got showered, and this little thought dawned on me. What is it, you ask. Well, let me tell you ... 

I feel AH-MAY-ZING! 

Yeah, that's it. Just that little thought. After hitting the treadmill for 45 minutes (with 10-15 of that running in intervals) and doing 20-odd minutes of bis and tris, I feel magnificent. Well, after my shower, that is. 

Isn't it funny how moving our body just for an hour can remind us that we're alive? 

This is an epiphany for me because I am very much about experiences. I like to taste, see, and feel all that life has to offer. This explains my love affair with food. 

I have, at times, felt that a piece of chocolate cake or some really good cheese enchiladas were going to make me feel amazing. Big surprise, they didn't. I might have thoroughly enjoyed their consumption, but I know I felt bloated and tired afterward. 

After working out, I feel energized. Now I know why that darn Denise Austin is always so stinkin' peppy. 

"Exercise gives people endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands." Quick! Name the movie. 

Now, I am in no way endorsing prohibition when it comes to sweet treats and savory delicacies, but I am noticing that I need to create a better balance between my love of food and my love of feeling strong and in control. 

So, this is the perfect segue into my newest endeavor. This is the point at which my husband would roll his eyes because I am "always" off on a new endeavor, according to him. While it might be true, this endeavor is serious.

I'm calling it Operation Healthy. It's in response to my PCOS that is kicking my butt and my general lack of attention to being healthy over these past several years. I'm getting together a plan, which includes scheduled workouts, eating dos and don'ts, and motivation to be a healthier me. 

I'll share more on it later today, if my little monster will allow me to blog. 

Anyone who's with me, say "Aye!" 

Get out and move your body today! I promise you'll feel better! 

Monday, November 7, 2011

Handing Over the Reins

I'll spare anyone taking the time to read this (hello, is anyone out there?) my quips about being away so long. I'm just going to own the fact that, for now, I'm a sporadic blogger. Consistency is not my strong point in anything. I'm working on that with several things ... 


I blog when it's quiet and I have time to think. For the record, that is not a lot a time with a husband that travels and a three-and-a-half-year-old mini-me on the loose. I swear, my kid's got more energy than that annoying Energizer bunny, but at least he's infinitely cuter. 


Right now, the house is quiet and I'm thinking. Who am I kidding? I'm ALWAYS thinking. It's one of my many quirks; sometimes I like it, a lot of times I hate it. My mind never. turns. off. Never. Hello, my name is Krystal and I'm an overthinker. I've been overthinking for nearly 35 years now ... I digress. On to the nitty gritty.


Do you ever think about who you are? Why you act/react the way you do? Why you function the unique way you do?


I am all too guilty of this. I am constantly obsessing over who I am, why I act/react like I do, and what in the world the Lord wants out of this semi-crazy, but functioning brain of mine.


I'll take a second to just lay it out there and pronounce that I am an overly emotional person. Meaning, I have enough emotions for at least two, maybe three, people. Nearly everything I do comes from emotion. Thus, you can see the obsession with how and why I act and react as I do.


Running on emotions is like walking a dental-floss-thin tightrope with no safety net. It can be the best of times, and it can be the worst of times. When I'm feeling secure in who I am, it is the best rush of my life. I'm reaching out to people, trying to bless everyone I come in contact with, and generally feeling vivacious and full of the Spirit. It's utter euphoria.


BUT, and that's a big, strong but, when I'm insecure (which has been my homeland of late), I become a recluse and just want this big, bad world to leave me in peace. I question my relationships, whether I'm good enough, and what my little gestures even really do to make this world a better place. 


Much of the time, I feel a tug of war between these two worlds. I can vacillate between security and insecurity with the snap of a finger. 


Is this a woman thing, or is it just a me thing? Anyone else out there feel this way? 


After having a pretty rough go of it last week (progesterone blues, anyone?), I've resolved that I want to live my life on the secure side. I don't want my actions and reactions to be dictated by my surroundings, relationships, mood, etc. 


I desire to be a consistent version of me. The best me, the Spirit-filled me. I truly believe that's what the Lord desires of us. To be steadfast, to be strong, to be unwavering in His spirit. 


After all, if Jesus could look upon his mockers and take the shame of their sins in order to save us all, I can surely go about my days with joy and thanksgiving in my heart. 


I've been given so much; I don't want to wander through life being fickle and insecure. In doing so, I'm holding God back from what He wants to do with me. I'm barring the door for His light to shine through me to others. 


I've got to realize that it's not about me, it's about Him. It's not about my try; it's about His will. I need to unclutter my heart so that He can furnish His space there and make it warm and welcoming. Only then will others be able to see Him shine through me and seek to know Him more. That is my ultimate goal. 



Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties; 
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
 And lead me in the way everlasting.

~ Psalm 139:23-24