Thursday, January 27, 2011

More hours in the day ... week ... year?

OK, I know it's not just me. Oh, please, tell me it's not just me. Here's my conundrum:

Am I the ONLY ONE who sees what other moms have time for in their days/lives and wonders how in the world they get it all done and remain sane and somewhat put together? 

I'm really struggling with this one lately. Really. My token answer for most things tends to be that "I don't have time." Why is there a pile on the kitchen counter of Christmas cards? I don't have time to put them away. Why are there four separate piles on the desk of God-knows-what? I don't have time to file it all and decide if I should keep it and where it should go shall I decide to keep it. Why do I have 14 (yes, probably 14) scrapbooks that are blank and just waiting for me to put my little hands on them and create? I don't have time for that stuff. Between the laundry, house, three-year-old tornado, etc., I JUST DON'T HAVE TIME. 

I know my husband's sick of this answer. Frankly, I'm sick of this answer. It seems the more I see people who seem to have an infinite number of more hours in their day, the more it drags me down because I just assume I'm doing something wrong. I'm spending too much time out of the house, I'm on Facebook too much, I'm reading blogs too much, I'm blogging too much, I'm watching too much TV, etc. 

There is an ounce (perhaps more) of truth to this. I have an addictive personality and tend to gravitate toward time-sucking activities. Words With Friends, anybody? Hello! So, I have to own that portion of it. I need to start really examining A) what I do spend my time on and B) what I would rather be spending my time on. 

Let's face it: I'm never going to be one of these "It's 4 p.m. and I've fed the children twice, washed the windows, baked some muffins just because, worked on little Jimmy's ABCs with him, darned my husband's socks, and sewed new curtains for the living room just in time to begin my gourmet dinner of ham, potatoes, and homemade bread with bananas foster for dessert." Ehhh. Ain't gonna happen. And that's not really what I'm looking for anyway. 

I want to have more control over my time. Isn't that paradoxical? I do have control over my time. I really do. Ouch. That stung. Telling myself that hurt. You know why? Because it puts the responsibility all on me.  

I need to bring this before the Lord, every day. I need to recognize time management as a weakness of mine and ask for the Lord's direction and provision every day. 

It's like when Leonardo DiCaprio says in Titanic, "You learn to take life as it comes at you, to make each day count." I want to make each day count. Because, in the end, I'm not going to reminisce about how many friends I had on Facebook or how many years I watched a particular TV show, that will all be dust in the wind. I will reminisce about the people closest to me, the experiences that shaped me, and the winding path the Lord took me down. 

I want to recapture what is mine: my time. Here's to making it count! 

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