My Dearest Metabolism,
How in the world are you? I know it seems like months since I've written or even thought about you, but I'm beginning to worry when or IF you'll ever come back. Please do. I miss you.
I know you probably thought I didn't need you once I grew up, but I need you now more than ever. It feels like you just turned your back on me and ran away, leaving mass amounts of chocolate and stretchy pants in your wake.
I promise if you come back I'll give you a prettier, albeit smaller (hopefully), place to live and I'll feed you more salads and less saturated fat. I'm not trying to butter you up, believe me.
I just need you in my life. Please come home. You complete me.
Sincerely,
Miss K
BWHAHAHAHAHA! LOVE IT and soooo true.
ReplyDeleteHow have I already gained like 900 pounds this pregnancy?
Oh wait...it's because I turned 30 and my metabolism left on vacation!!!